G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero (Volume 2)

"Reinstated! 2 (of 4)"

Story (and Layouts): Josh Blaylock

Pencils: Steve Kurth

Inks: John Larter

Colors: Hi-Fi Colour Design

PLOT SYNOPSIS:

Cobra has commandeered a powerful satellite in order to move forward with Cobra Commander's nano-tech ambitions revealed in the previous issue. (I predict you will geek out something fierce in response to the Cobra symbol framing the faceplate on the astronaut's helmet in the opening panel.)

This opening triumph is broadcast live via remote cameras in yet another satellite: Destro's. He narrates his intentions to Bludd, Zartan, Tomax and Xamot, none of whom, we quickly realize, had anything to do with Destro's surprise takeover of the Cobra Empire at the end of our previous issue. Zartan in particular makes clear his unwillingness to quietly cede to Destro's supposed authority. To soothe the tension, Destro reminds his reluctant colleagues of Cobra Commander's boast that his nano-mites can kill someone effortlessly, leaving no trace of evidence.

"What my programmers have found through further research," Destro adds with a cheerfully pedantic and chilling smile, "is that by merely attacking parts of the brain, there are much more interesting effects than death."

We cut to still more video footage, this time from a padded room, where an agitated Cobra Commander stands ranting and raving at a pair of nonplussed guards ("My soap is morphing!") Destro explains that as soon as the satellite is active, they will be able to use cell phones and computers and the like to create similar mental fits (or death, of course) in anyone they wish. Destro then politely notes that everyone in attendance had been "laced with the nano-mites" two weeks previous. His invitation for any "potential defectors" to proceed out the door is unsurprisingly ignored. More intriguing still, Destro reveals that he has not infected Zartan; the nano-mites, for Zartan, will serve not as a threat, but as an enticement, for they can cure his mysterious "skin condition" alluded to in issue number one.

Back at Joe Headquarters, our returning legends meet the latest recruits, and while said recruits are appropriately star struck, Blaylock knows that such a worshipping approach can quickly wear thin for even the giddiest reader, and so he deflates the awe via Shipwreck's exasperated cry, "Enough of this 'Kiss-Up-To-Your-Favorite-Joe-Vet Day'…"

Scarlett likens Cobra's plan to something out of an Asimov novel (it would have made for a nice continuity nod to have had Grand Slam be the one to make that observation, what with his famous love of comic books and science fiction), and Duke notes that the nano-mites may be more dangerous on their own (in other words, "Cobra is in over their head.")

Duke then offers his Joes a "Joe-Com," being a high-tech wrist gauntlet that can accomplish more in the way of communications, medical aid and pure survival than most complete bases of operations, including nutrients which can be delivered directly through the pores if necessary.

Meanwhile, Rumsfeld (!) holds an impromptu press conference to introduce General Hawk to address the public's concerns. He downplays Cobra's return, insisting that G.I. Joe is "An anti-TERRORIST task force. Not just an anti-Cobra force."

The Dreadnoks watch this press conference from their everglades hideout, and we get our first look at the new Dreadnok leader, Zartan's daughter Zanya, a slender, sinister lass with black and green dreadlocks (a Dreadnok with dreadlocks; I suppose it was inevitable) who calls to mind a mix of Rob Zombie and Linda Perry circa 1992. The overall effect, if I might revert to literary jargon for a moment, is "Hot."

Zanya immediately sets about mobilizing her unwashed troops, but Destro interrupts, reminds her that he is in charge now, minimizes the danger posed by the Joes, and finally dismisses her distractedly as "Child." As you might have anticipated, Zanya does not look upon this treatment with much affection.

We move on to some fun scenes involving the juxtaposition of new Joes and old (you might be surprised which group of the two proves to be the most brash and cocky) and a boastful Dreadnok (Chop Shop) running afoul of Snake Eyes, plus some fun character development amongst the Dreadnoks as Zandar says, "Remember me? Probably not. No one ever remembers Zartan's brother Zandar" and Road Pig, well, hits people with his cinderblock hammer (hey, that's just who he is.)

The issue ends with the Joes attacking the Dreadnoks and Cobras in the everglades, and having a rough go of it because of booby traps in the swamp (in one memorable scene, a "Greenshirt" rookie falls into a gator pit and screams "My legs! My legs!"), as Cobra takes to the skies in their anti-gravity pods for an aerial attack, leaving things looking more bleak than ever for G.I. Joe.

REVIEWER'S VERDICT:

I must comment briefly on J. Scott Campbell's cover, featuring Destro and Baroness looking simultaneously cute, vicious and… well… somehow bubbly. On one hand, Destro makes for quite an imposing figure with Cobra Commander's hood clutched triumphantly in his fist. It's a very "Wow!" kind of image. But then, look at Destro's torso. Behold the dizzying rolls of muscle. Baroness looks similarly inflated. They're like sexy balloons or something.

Moving on.

Josh Blaylock's alternately grim and fun approach makes for a very inviting read. Old characters feel special, new developments are exciting and scary, and the central Joe VS. Cobra premise is given as much plausibility as is possible without compromising the goofy appeal of some of its more eccentric elements.

As a Sigma 6 enthusiast, I enjoyed the "Joe-Com" scene very much, for the Joe-Com seems almost to have been a small-scale precursor to the Sigma suit. It was also good fun to see the updated Mainframe; he is now (or at least in his lone scene in this issue, wherein he reports to the Joes via video from his lab) more machine than man, with only his face peering out from an entire suit made of what appears to be the same material from whence the "Joe-Coms" were forged.

Luckily for those of you who require more than mere gadgetry from your comics, Blaylock once again incorporates some quiet but insightful political commentary into this issue. At one point, news of Cobra's return leaks to the press despite the government's efforts to deny it, and I am reminded of J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, wherein the Ministry of Magic chooses to discredit Dumbledore rather than face the return of Voldemort and the public panic that would ensue from such an announcement; I am of course also reminded of plenty of similar acts that have occurred in recent years in the real world, in my very own country, in fact. But in the interests of keeping these reviews apolitical, I shall refrain from exploring these parallels in detail.

Destro opting to drive Cobra Commander crazy is of course nothing more than a contrived attempt on Blaylock's part to account for Destro's stupidity in engaging in the timeless villainous ceremony of Not Killing One's Opponent When One Has The Chance, but on the other hand, the thought of microscopic machines having a go at your brain to induce crippling dementia is decidedly creepier than a simple bullet to the temple, so I will tentatively endorse this plot development for now, not least because it leads to a delightful splash page featuring poor Cobra Commander struggling against his guards, who from his paranoid perspective are not mere guards but instead an entire legion of mocking enemies made up of not just Joes but also traitors from his own ranks. What's special about this page is that Mindbender, Duke, Bazooka and Serpentor (!) and the dozens of other assailants are all rendered in a cartoony style reminiscent of the 1980s animated series. To see a beautifully- and realistically-illustrated Cobra Commander brought to life with the latest coloring technologies and struggling against a series of simplistic, innocent-looking attackers is quite a surreal treat.

While this issue's cliffhanger is nowhere near as gripping as last issue's, the story is roaring along at a frankly frantic pace, and if the goal of any given comic book is to entice the reader to pursue the following issue, most any G.I. Joe fan will agree that Blaylock and Steve Kurth have succeeded admirably in this, the second issue of G.I. Joe A Real American Hero Volume 2.